Am I loyal? To myself?

So today’s daily prompt is Loyal. When I saw it, the very first statement I told myself was, “Am I loyal to myself?” And then I started to scrutinize myself. Wow, I seriously don’t know the explanation for that. Maybe I am loyal to myself, maybe not.

If I am not loyal, then how come I confess my fault, my guilt in front of my mirror? If I am not loyal, then how come I trust my own madness, how come I stick with myself through all the thick and thin? How come I am supportive of myself, how come my answers differs with different questions? Fair enough reasons to think that I am loyal to myself. But, yes there will always be a but, if there are even more reasons to believe that I am not loyal to myself? If I am loyal to myself, how do I convince myself to get away from the guilt? How come I change my speculation according to the ease of the situation, how come I sneak into my heart to cover up all the lies just to avoid the truth? How come I pretend that I am not feeling sad? Oh, great! Now I am not loyal to myself. Then that makes me a traitor to myself, a deceiver to myself. That makes me the scammer of my freedom.

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I should glean the answer for my loyalty. I can’t define my loyalty towards myself with the word, maybe. Because loyalty, it isn’t grey. It’s either black or white. I am either loyal to myself completely or not at all loyal. I can’t change the connotation of loyalty according to my justification, my circumstances.

I need to maintain the spirit of loyalty to myself as a commitment for surging my personal growth and development. I need to be just myself, whatever the hell that is, and not just playing some roles. I need to stop manipulating the truths by making myself a figment of my own selfish fantasy.

Loyalty, it’s so easy to say,

But it doesn’t always stay.

Loyalty, its starts with you,

Stick to it, whatever you do.

Behold the power of your heart,

Spread the loyalty in every parts.

**

via daily prompt: Loyal

 

7 Replies to “Am I loyal? To myself?”

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